Pause and Connect

I’ve concluded that life is about making memories really....

 Meaningful, sometimes  frothy things that bring a smile to your face and a lightness of heart when you take them out to view them from time to time.  Things that are recorded, visually, written words, music, artful treasures and memory bank stuff.  Stuff where others are able to catch a glimpse of the raw essence of you, the authenticity of your soul whispers what lies deep within the sacred sanctuary of your heart space, no matter how fleeting the glimpse, it’s there to be found, to be witnessed, to be seen.  Its takes time and a big splash of courage to step off the invisible treadmill of life.  That treadmill that has us seemingly stuck fast, super glued on.  Running, racing, walking, dragging, weary, hyper but forever on it.

We step off it from time to time, for fractional moments of pleasure.  Mostly quick snatched moments of unconnected pleasure...A quick phone call, quick lunch, quick dinner, quick facebook message, quick email, too many quick glasses of wine, sandwiches, fast food. Quick,  quick, quick.  This is life today as many of us know it.  We’re to busy to consider how we’re going to step off the treadmill.  If we don’t step off it now we may not get another chance today, we tell ourselves, so we make it quick, furtive, fearful someone maybe watching us, our inner gremlins waiting to pounce with pointy painful reminders of how we are just not enough if we stray from the doing, the approval seeking, the busyness which reflects just how well we are doing, the incessant whir of the modern day life treadmill which will lead us to the goal.  Success. Hurrah

  .   We tell ourselves that when we have enough money, we’ll be able to....do all the things we dream of doing.  When we reach our goals, we’ll have enough ?  to be really happy?  Really?   How do we define  There’s a wonderful old tale about a fisherman who meets a corporate bigwig who want to set him in a great business....check it out it depicts this whole subject in a nutshell.  Could we look at stepping OFF the treadmill as the REAL need to our success and well being instead of staying on it as the perceived way to a successful wonderful life?

Could we change the way success is viewed in our busy world and incorporate the delicious moments of joyful pause and connect as a regular way of life.   Maybe we could with a bit of practise we could get to the place where we finally realise that we don't even have to step on the treadmill in the first place, or that if we are on it then we realise that we can happily step off it without feeling we are stuck.  We could, if we paused for long enough to quieten the wild ponies galloping in our heads, realise that we don’t even have to push the door open to the room of have to, should, got to and must. We can in fact, make everyday small soul connecting moments, an integral part of our lives.  It might just slow down a bit of time, lessen the need to get everything right or to aspire to a perfect ‘then I will be happy’ life.   We could realise our need for approval through busyness will only leave us feeling empty exhausted and with less than glittering gold stars.  We will definitely realise that after every goal another slips in silent, deadly and with just as many, if not more demands on our time, our energy, adding yet more to our list of have to’s. 

We are bombarded by adverts, messages and demands from every available method.  The L’Oreal ‘because I’m worth it’ advertisement makes me want to through up in a bucket.  The more thank slick TV commercials,  always designed to make us feel completely inadequate if you don't subscribe to their tribe.  It’s a form of commercial gaslighting. Seducing you in, making you feel like shit, then hey we can fix you.  There’s nothing to fix.  Get off the treadmill! 

When we get away from all that really unhealthy insidious underhand messaging and begin to look at what we already have, where we’ve come from, what we’ve learnt along the way and using what we now have to make kind gentle moments that hold purpose and meaning, we can then begin to feel what real happiness actually FEELS like.  

Imagine growing something in a pot on a windowsill, on a wall, on a balcony, in your garden.  Small manageable simple.  You have touched some earth energy, some soil, some water.  You’ve nurtured, waited, watched, maybe researched.  You’ve connected.   You're feeling.  You've paused and connected.   What do you think will do your body mind and spirit more good.  Treadmill or pot plant?
It sounds trite.  Its not meant to.  I'm serious.  Having spent just over a week walking on early morning grass. Doing just one stretch and a few back exercises, even though my judging mind was screaming at me NOT to do it,  I am now beginning to feel the real benefits of pause and connect.

A modern day version of success can leave us feeling flat, depleted and unsure about what's truly missing in our lives.  Lots of my friends have been saying this.  They have the lovely house, the great car, some money in the bank and when they just do a few more years, they'll be able to do what they really want, move to Greece, go around the world, do all manner of things in their heads.  So why are they feeling so depleted and empty along the way to the promised land?

If we can be the best version of our most wonderful selves along the way, creating small moments of 'because I can' (as opposed to because I'm worth it) delight, pausing, connecting, feeling, absorbing, savouring.  This is true memory making.  Creating happy moments of pleasure to look back on with joy and a feeling of contentment.  That amazing hot chocolate that cost a fortune in St Marks Square sitting alone, listening to man playing a grand piano dressing in a dinner suit, with an electric standard lamp alight, while I paused and connected with the atmosphere, the feeling and recorded my notes in the most tiny diary ever.  Sitting in a remote mountain outcrop having just picked wild artichokes bubbling in a pot of rice, no electric no water but the most amazing smells and aromas with a crazy mountain woman who had invited us to lunch...holding my first grandchild and just connecting for eternity.  This are some of my memories of pausing and connecting to what really matters.

So this week what will yours be? What makes your heart sing?  Where could you just lean over and stop off the treadmill to pause for a bit, connect with your soul stuff and let little bubbles of happiness cover you in delight? 

Keep in touch over on fb Soulspace....I'm going to set up a 30 day challenge this week.  Lets all make our worlds a bit more connected, a bit more joyful and a lot more delightful as we band together to pause...and connect.

With love as always . Detta x x x