Tuesday, 8 February 2011

Twenty One Day Creative Soul Journey

I am in Kefalonia - Island of Dreams, Delusions and Drama!  I have come to see my beautiful daughter, her brand new baby, my first grandson and to revisit my past on this stunningly gorgeous island.  My son has been with me for the first week.  It was wonderful.  It has been an emotional roller-coaster, one I haven't fully been able to ride with ease.  Does one ever ride an emotional roller-coaster with ease?

I am a woman who operates from a place of honesty, a place of basic necessity.  With me what you see is what you get.  I'm not great with mind games, intrigue, manipulation or needing to be right/center stage/best.  I try to concede with good grace.  This first week I have had to face all of the previously mentioned stuff.  It hasn't been easy.  I have had to, for the sake of my daughter, understand the whole Greek Grandmother knows best.  The forty days thing - I don't have 40 days here with my daughter.  I thought I would be a huge help.  I'm not.  She has her husbands family around every day.

I am really unsure what exactly my role is here.  My husband wants me to come home.  I know I have to stay - I'm just not sure exactly why, but I am staying for the month.  I know I can be the quiet support my gorgeous daughter needs.  The loving arms in the background with no judgement attached to the hands.  I know I can offer her a safe haven if she chooses to use it, if only for a tiny moment in this new and wondrous journey of hers.  I have run the gauntlet of emotions this past week - huge highs where my heart has felt like it would burst with love, with appreciation of the beauty of this place, of pride in seeing my daughter grow into a marvelous mother, in joy at my son's quiet but strong demeanor, his reassuring presence and his grounding energy.

I have felt lonely, painfully alone, missing my husband and the warmth of my UK home.  I have also felt a pure peace, writing, journaling, painting whilst looking an impossibly blue sea, tiny fishing boats on the vast ocean and the lure of the next island beckoning on the almost touchable island opposite.  I haven't slept well, yet on one occasion have slept the deepest sleep I've had in ages.  This is a strange and bewitching island and just when you think you can't stand another minute of stubborn island life, something amazing happens and everything changes.  It just add's to my emotional confusion.  That said I must not forget why I have come.  Last night was magical.  I fed my little grandson and laid him on my ample bosom!  He slept happy and contented for the next three hours until I left for home.  What a beautiful and touching few hours that was.

And so, putting everything else aside.  I have decided to make good use of the next 21 days and walk my own Creative Soul Journey.  I will be journaling, art making, poetry writing and taking photos of anything that is relevant, inspiring, soul feeding and good for my creative soul.  I hope you will join me....
Today is DAY ONE:  My journal entry is entitled 'What do I Need for the next 21 Days'  Please feel free to join me on a day or several days and post your own thoughts, pictures and comments I will honor them as though they were my own....

So I'll ask you my question..."What do YOU need in your life to feel complete/at ease/content/happy/motivated or any other feeling you want to feel?"   Post your answers and lets see what we need as 'human beans all in the can together!'
Happy Days   x D  


Sue said...

I so want to join your journey!!! The school term has just begun, which limits my 'me' time quite severely - so I have decided perhaps I need to incoporate some of the school 'me' into the rest of my life, rather than stubbornly trying to keep them separate in an attempt to avoid having school Eat My Life (it can do that so easily, and lead to burn-out...)

What do I need to feel complete? I need my motorbike - even if it's just the daily commute. As part of the bigger picture, I need to feel connected to the Earth - whether it's weeding the garden, picking vegies, watching the sky change through the course of the day or riding through the countryside.

And in my limited time - that will have to do! Off to help develop young minds - have a lovely day! xox

diary of an unfinished woman said...

Sue thats brilliant you have recognised what you need to incorporate and to feel complete. I love your motorbike and am deeply envious! Earth connection helps us feel grounded and is meditative as well as giving us space to ponder our deepest dreams and most wonderful wishes in a safe non judgemental space....so dream big dreams you can dream whatever you want...young minds need wonderful women like you! You have a fabulous day x